dreamed free to love

April 13, 2012 § 2 Comments

I dreamed I was free to love
woke up to a screen screaming images of a jarring sequence
seen at the local precinct or torture center and I was the enemy
trying to shake any last decent thought I entertained of being human
like pouring wet cement
in the valves of this heart and hardened slowly
I didn’t let it happen

I dreamed I was free to love
Woke up with my fingers in the light socket
and blew my charred remains a kiss goodbye
I wait patiently for reassembly

Dreamed I was free to love
Woke up hanging by a thread
to some words that they told me were never said
But I held them in my head just the same

Had a dream I was free love
and woke up to insults being poured in wounds the size of a fault line
like a free for all in a salt mine
but I pay them no mind

dared dream I was free to love
Woke up inside the clenched jaws of some feeling heavy as a bear trap that wouldn’t budge
the glimmer of its stubborn steel teeth mocking me for taking the bait
for trying to love
I laughed back and kept prying at those jaws and wait
for them to open

Had a dream I was free to love
I was awakened by the sound of screaming doves
falling from the sky with firey wing tips
their crime was a love for the sun so intense
that it made them long for it
made them drawn to it so they set out at dawn
to meet its warm embrace
and as they came too close to its face it gave a kiss
too much to bear

and they collapsed

and I collect their cascading feathers from the air
and prepare for tomorrow’s endeavors-
perhaps-

to rebuild these wings
to try again—to take this sign
that love is not perfected in a day nor a lifetime
but grateful for the chance to try

and I thanked the owner of the sky
and the sun
for reminding me

that love takes more than a lifetime

and we have only just begun.

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